La Bahia Pirata -

If you yearn for the days when pirates swore, bled, and schemed under a real sun—without a kraken in sight—you will find La Bahía Pirata a welcome port in a storm of CGI-laden blockbusters.

In theaters now. Runtime: 2 hours, 18 minutes. Rated R for violence, language, and some thematic elements. La bahia pirata

Carlos Rivera-Ortiz Starring: Diego Luna, Ana de Armas, Pedro Pascal (voice), and newcomer Mateo Uribe If you yearn for the days when pirates

When Mateo’s mentor is murdered by Vargas’s men, he teams up with (Ana de Armas), a cynical tavern owner and former pirate’s daughter, and the disembodied, sardonic voice of a ghostly parrot (Pedro Pascal, having a ball). Together, they assemble a ragtag crew to find the treasure—not for gold, but to buy their freedom from an empire that has used them all as pawns. The High Points: Blood, Salt, and Chemistry The film’s greatest weapon is its sense of place. Rivera-Ortiz shoots on real Caribbean locations, not a green screen. The sand is hot, the water is blindingly blue, and the sword fights are bruising, messy, and wet. One mid-film skirmish on a sinking galleon is a masterclass in practical stunts—ropes snap, wood splinters, and you feel every stumble. Rated R for violence, language, and some thematic elements

, as the voice of Loro (the parrot), provides scene-stealing comic relief without becoming a nuisance. His muttered asides (“We’re going to die. I told you. I told everyone. Nobody listens to the bird.”) land every time. The Lower Decks: Pacing and Predictability Where La Bahía Pirata springs a leak is in its midsection. The second act drags, spending too much time on a jungle trek that, while beautifully shot, feels like filler. A subplot involving a rival English pirate crew is introduced and then abandoned so abruptly you’ll wonder if a reel went missing.